Komplex Sinplicities On Sale Now!

Hello!

And welcome! I am proud to announce that my book, Komplex Sinplicities, is now available on Amazon in paperback and e-book. An innovative book that’s perfect for the reader-on-the-go, the coffee table, or where ever!

So what’s in it KS2-BACKGROUNDcoverfor you? Well, let’s take a look!

Komplex Sinplicities has three sections:

Section One consists of poetry and things like poetry that aren’t poetry.

Section Two is made up of insane prophecies and commandments to live by that you probably shouldn’t live by.

Section Three is a collection of short stories; humor, horror, and all around silliness.

This book is guaranteed to add some spice to your library. But don’t take my word for it. Grab a copy and see for yourself! I’d love to hear what you thought of it!

Thanks for stopping by, and I hope to hear from you soon!

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Annoying Things That Annoy Me . . . Annoyingly

Sometimes, we simply get annoyed about things that there may or may not be a plausible cause for. Perhaps there was something from our childhood that has rooted a giant that is now in your life that just drives you crazy?

YES! Well . . .               Upset Pout Face Angry Woman Emotion Dissatisfied

This is a stupid and completely unnecessary list (not to mention a total waste of time) of SOME of those things that get under my skin and crawl around like wriggling hell worms that hate cute, adorable puppies and cotton candy Halloween pretzels with sugar sprinkles.

So, here we go!

  1. CHEWING! I despise chewing, and here’s why: it’s so-o-o a waste of time. I mean, sure there is a host of reasons why we must engage in the chewing process, but OMG! Is there not something else I could be using my time for? Um, let me thi – YES!
  2. Eating. Eating follows the same reasoning as chewing, so let’s move on . . . .
  3. Restroom Activities. Sigh. Do I have to say anything, really?
  4. Holier-Than-Thou Attitudes. Damn. No, this one goes on my things that piss me the “F” off more than mini size milkshakes.
  5. Bad Drivers. What defines a bad driver, you may ask? Well, a bad driver is a person that clearly needs to retake a driver’s test. Driving 20 miles per hour under the posted speed limit? Bad driver. Someone who flies around you like a bat out of hell just to come to an immediate slow down to make a turn? Bad driver. Pulling out in front of you on a major road and doesn’t start to come to posted speed until 300 feet down the road, thus causing you to slow down to a near complete stop? BAD FRICK’N DRIVER!
  6. Little Annoying Things. This should be a list of its own. Things such as: fad clothes, fad haircuts, attitudes against you because you haven’t jumped on the FAD train. Being late for something only to have to deal with a bad driver. Water rings left on the table from the condensation from your glass. Ok. You get the point.
  7. Stupid People. Need . . . I . . . say . . . more? (Weak and badly timed laugh)
  8. Extremists. More specifically, extremists that lack the ability to use their common sense to look at facts and history and make an intelligent decision on a matter instead of believing something AS fact just because some one says it is or else.
  9. Smacking While Eating or Chewing Gum. Are you seriously asking for every living thing on the planet capable of slapping you to slap you? Are you? Seriously?
  10. Talking During a Movie at a Movie Theater. Have you ever seen a large bag filled with super buttered popcorn used as a lethal weapon? No? Then keep talking!
  11. Making a Cup of Coffee or Tea and There’s NO SUGAR! Or, even worse, only a few grains of sugar to mock you from accomplishing your life goal of a delicious cup of yumminess.
  12. Political CRAP! Yes, I capitalized every single letter of the word CRAP.
  13. Crinkle Noises From Cellophane and Chip Bags. More specifically, said noise(s) in a quiet room.

Alright. This can go on forever, so let me just make a paragraph structure of the next few things right off the top of my head to help speed things up. Annoyed Mauzen Stroke Cat Stress Teeth Annoy

Dying batteries, ass kissers (which should be number one on this list), bugs (gnats, flies, fleas, and mosquitos especially), yapping and whiney dogs – not to mention barking dogs that never ever shut up, humidity, being hungry . . . and/or thirsty, light bulbs blowing out, bleeding on the job, solicitors, being sick – especially having a drippy nose, people who do something wrong then look at you like it’s your fault and are willing to lash out at you about it, pin pointing a problem to a “professional” and they still say you’re wrong, cleaning (dust, dishes, clothes, etc.), people who think you are less of a human because you don’t live and think like they do, the fact that there are laws to enforce laws that have been made to enforce the laws that enforce the original laws which are more than likely stupid and pointless to begin with, having to go to the doctor for anything, fumbling with coffee filters, tea going bad, soda going flat, blog posts like this one . . . although they are fun to write (smiley face), always running out of gas in your vehicle, body aches and pains, dead cell phone batteries and no signal areas – the dreaded “dead zones”, war (not the song, btw. That song rocks!), small parking spaces meant for your car that are only big enough for a bicycle, people that act like they’re happy all the time when you know they really aren’t, and, to throw in one more to end this crazy thing, shaving.

Right, so there are obviously a lot of things that annoy me, and, of course, more personal things I didn’t add to the list. But who cares? Let’s hear about something that annoys you! Post it in the comments below, and thanks for stopping by!

Komplex Sinplicities Character Interviews

Hi and hello! Today, I have with me a few special guests to speak with from my book, Komplex Sinplicities. Let’s see, we have with us Aldwin, from The Game, Carly, from No More Apart, Stephen, from The Unwelcomed Guest, and Amberly, from The Cereal Thief. Let’s get started!

KR: Ok! So, in no particular order, let’s start with Carly. Hello, Carly!

Carly: Hi! How are you?

KR: I’m good! I’m good! Welcome! And thank you for joining us today!

Carly: Thank you! Glad to be here!

KR: No problem! So, uh, in the story, No More Apart, you played a wife who had a beautiful life ahead of her and was brutally murdered.

Carly: Yep.

Me: Wanna tell us how you felt about playing that part?

Carly: Well, you wrote it, of course, but it was actually pretty intense! Robert (no offense, Robert!) is a scary looking guy. So when he came after me to do the rape thing, most of that, from me, wasn’t acting. It was for real!

KR: Well, you weren’t suppose to know what was about to happen. We needed that raw emotion for the readers, ya know?

Carly: *chuckles* Yeah, but you could have written me a heads up! That guy is spooky as hell! I thought I was going to have a frick’n heart attack!

KR: Yeah, except you were horrifically mutilated . . . .

Carly: Erm, yes. I was.

KR: Sorry. Just kidding. Well, I feel like you played the role very well. It was a graphic scene between you and Robert!

Carly: Oh, god, no kidding! And poor Johnny getting all smashed up and everything!

KR: The poor guy. *chuckles* He’s a good guy, but who cares, right?

Carly: O-o-oh ho ho ho you’re so mean!

KR: *laughs*

Carly: Harsh, but it is true! At least he didn’t have a guy’s head inside his body! *chuckles*

KR: The joys of being a writer. *laughs* Thanks, Carly! It’s been a pleasure. Next up? Aldwin! Get in here, hero! Aldwin from The Game, everybody!

Aldwin: That would be me, yes. Thank you.

KR: Whatever. So! Quite a show there with the suicide club thing.

Aldwin: I wouldn’t exactly call it a “club”.

KR: No, you wouldn’t. But I would. And I did!

Aldwin: Unfortunately.

KR: So, Aldwin, what did you think of the part I wrote for you?

Aldwin: Well, since you asked, I think . . .

KR: And where did you find these suicidal club members? How did you get a group of people together . . . that all wanted to . . . kill yourselves?

Aldwin: Um, it’s called fiction. It wasn’t real, Kyran.

KR: Yes, it was. Fiction, I mean.

Aldwin: It was a funny story though.

KR: That happens to be my opinion, also! Wow! We have so much in common!

Aldwin: No, I don’t . . .

KR: Thank you Aldwin! It was great having you here so I could waste your time!

Aldwin: Wasting the readers’ time . . . .

KR: Oh, yeah? You want to bring that attitude to the table? You just wait until after this interview, and see how I kill you off this time! *clears throat* Right! So! Let’s all give a big round of applause to our next guest, Stephen!

Stephen: Hey, Kyran!

KR: Hey, Stephen! How’s that trigger finger?

Stephen: *chuckles* Well, it’s better now! But you damn near broke it when you had me use that pistol as a damn carpenter’s mallet!

KR: Anyway, Stephen, that role in The Unwelcomed Guest was pretty twisted!

Stephen: Yes, it was rather sick, really.

KR: Yeah, disturbing! So, tell us, how hard was it for you to play that role? I mean, what was your method?

Stephen: I didn’t have a certain method or anything. It was more like me just knowing none of it was real and just moving forward with the scene.

KR: If you had a choice, how would you have written the story differently?

Stephen: Oh! Wow! The author asking the character in his story how they would write the story?

KR/Stephen: *both laugh*

KR: Well, just throw out an idea. Anything!

Stephen: Ok, well, I think I would had made it more clear, in a hinted sort of way, that the family’s house I went to wasn’t my actual family, you know?

KR: But then the ending would’ve been spoiled for the readers!

Stephen: Well, you asked. *chuckles*

KR: Ha! Ha! Yes I did. Thank you, Stephen. Our last guest played more of a supporting role, but she was fantastic nonetheless! Let’s bring in Amberly! Hello, Amberly!

Amberly: *smiling* Hi!

KR: Amberly, you played an annoyed older sister who was just . . . bored with life, bored with the world, bored with . . .

Amberly:  Bored with being held hostage!

KR: Indeed! Yes! Like you get held hostage every other day or something.

Amberly: *laughs*

KR: You played the part good, I think, but you don’t seem like the annoyed type?

Amberly: *more laughing* No, I’m not, but it seems to be my thing, so I just go along with it. I’m actually a happy-go-lucky sort of chick.

KR: Yeah, I get that from you! So, tell us, what did you like most about the story?

Amberly: Oh, gosh! What did I not like? I absolutely loved Brynn! She kept me rolling! Like, I mean, how many times did you have to stop typing because the story fell apart because of her?

KR: *laughs* She was a hoot, for sure!

Amberly: But, seriously, I also liked the other characters, too. And the names you came up with for those cereals? OMG! *laughs*

KR: Oh, the cereals! *laughs* Did you ever eat any of them?

Amberly: No! But I so-o-o wanted to try them!

KR: To be honest? So did I! *chuckles* So, thank you, Amberly! It was a pleasure having you in my book! Maybe we can do a part two to the story in the future?

Amberly: I would very much like to do a sequel! And thank you, too!

KR: You’re most welcome! So, that’s all the time we have today. I’d like to thank you for visiting my website. I hope, if you have read Komplex Sinplicities, that you have enjoyed it, and, if not, then you can go here to grab a copy for yourself.

I’d like to hear from you guys, so drop me a line! I may not be able to reply to all of them, but I will certainly read them. And as always, have an awesome day!

Ya Gotta Have Goals For 2016!

For some reason, people like to hear about goals authors set for themselves. I don’t blame them.  It’s interesting to look on the other side of the fence like that.

But! Here’s the thing . . .

People follow people for specific reasons. It could be because they’re interested in an author’s life, what a lead singer is having for lunch, or whatever. There’s countless reasons to follow some one of interest.

So, yes. This is my writing blog/website. It’s devoted to my writing. But I am, believe it or not, a real person. With real problems and concerns. And I even like to do things outside of writing.

GASP!!! Heaven forbid an author do ANYTHING except write all day every day!

Yeah, well, get over it. Anyhow, I thought I’d come up with a list of things I want to accomplish in 2016. They include things related to writing, but they also include other things also.

So, without further adieu, I give you my goals for 2016:

  1. Publish Komplex Sinplicities. If you read my blog before this one then you will already know that I have ordered my first proof for the paperback. There will be an eBook version to go along side it as well.
  2. Buy a vehicle. This one we did already. I say we because me and my wife don’t make those kind of decisions alone. Besides that, we may both drive it, but it’s really for her anyway.
  3. Work on my other writing projects. I have so much stuff to get out it’s crazy! I can’t just work on one thing. My mind doesn’t work like that. So I bounce from project to project.
  4. Work on illustrations. I have cover art and ads to work on, but I ALSO have a book project that will be illustrated almost like a children’s book would be. But this is no children’s book. I also have a comic strip type book I want to work on. Only time will tell.
  5. Publish one other book with eBook and one eBook. Talking about a challenge! This may be easy for some people to do, but not everyone has that kind of time! Again, only time will tell.
  6. Metal detect more. Until last year, I slacked off from my metal detecting. And that, my friends, is a real shame! So I plan on doing more of that and maybe some bottle digging. I have a sifting screen that I’m gonna put to more use this year too.
  7. Upgrade to a better metal detector. I’m more eager to do this than I can express with words! I’m looking at getting the Garrett At Pro and grab myself a NEL Tornado coil to go with it. It’s PAST time I found those deep targets that’s been out of my reach this whole time, dang it!
  8. Take a trip. Due to life and all that, me and my wife haven’t had the chance to really go anywhere in the last year or two. So this year I’m looking for us to take a trip. We know where we want to go, but it’s going to be a while yet before we are able to. It is what it is, I guess.
  9. Make some videos. I have a camera, not a very good one, mind you, but I have one all the same. Whether it’s metal detecting videos or videos about writing, I’m looking to throw some up on Youtube. If you have any ideas for some, let me know!
  10. The usual crap. Every year I tell myself I’m going to lose some weight, eat better, and blah blah blah. Well, I did lose about twenty five pounds last year. Don’t ask me how I did it, but I did! But my #10 goal(s) are just the usual things we all say we’re going to do every year, but end up not doing.

And there ya have it! My personal top ten goals for 2016. It’s not everything I want to accomplish this year, but it’s the ones I think you would be interested in knowing about.

So tell us what goals have you set for yourself this year in the comments below. And tell us how you’re currently working towards them. Until next time, and as always, have an awesome day!

First Proof For Komplex Sinplicities In The Mail

It has been one long and tedious journey to even get to this point: Ordering the first proof for the paperback. Whoo hoo!

But, we’re not out of the frying pan just yet. There is still plenty of work ahead. With that said, I want to go over a couple of things about where I am at right now with my writing.

Firstly, let’s go over what will happen once the proof arrives. So the files look good and the eBook files are waiting for their upload. It has been my experience, being this is my first paperback, that publishing a paperback is a whole different baby than doing eBooks.

In short, eBooks are formatted differently. You only need a front cover where as you need to create the spine and front and back covers for the paperback. The paperback cover has to be tweaked to meet the page count.

The interior is also different. Paperbacks are just that . . . paperbacks. Which is to say you are printing a physical book. So when formatting for this you have to think more traditionally.

On the flip side of this are the eBook files which are HTML and look different on digital devices. although there is a lot of freedom with what all you can do with digital files there are some things you’re going to have to sacrifice in order for the book to look right on a person’s reader.

Another thing to think about are pictures, links, and so on. Of course, in a paperback these things are printed on the page wherever they are in the file. Not so with eBooks. However, links can be clicked in digital files which will take the reader where ever you want to take them; website, landing page, etc.

Most people already know these things, so I’m not going to go into formatting details here.

Secondly, as stated before, the work isn’t over yet. Once the proof arrives it will need to be thoroughly gone over and looked at with the attention to detail of a forensics lab.

Such things I’ll be looking for are:

How does the cover look?

  • Do the images (live elements) fit? Are they cascading too much one way or another? Are they off kilter? Too short on any side? How is the image quality? Is the text clear and readable?

How does the interior look?

  • Are the pages starting on the correct page numbers? Is the text aligned properly? Is there any weird spacing anywhere? After reading the book from cover to cover, were there any grammatical and punctuation errors?

. . . and so on.

After going over every inch of the book, corrections will be made (if there are any and there probably will be) and the  files will be re-uploaded. Should that be the case then another proof will be ordered and the cycle repeats itself.

Once everything is fixed and finalized then comes the heart pounding moment when you push the Publish button. But hold on a minute!

Are you promoting? Do you even have a marketing strategy? This should have been worked out a long time ago. If you don’t or haven’t promoted yet then don’t release that book into the world just yet. You need a following!

I’ve got my marketing strategy laid out. It may not be the best of them, but I feel it will be good enough. It’s not like I’m looking to be the next J.K. Rowling. I just want people to read my stuff.

Anyway, moving right along . . . .

So what’s to be expected after Komplex Sinplicites? Well, I plan on writing a blog post just on this topic; and maybe soon. But, for now, I’ll just say there are several other projects in the works.

The hard part is is there are so many of them. Writing takes time and, sometimes, focus. I’m a fairly busy guy! And there are a lot of times when I just don’t feel like writing for whatever reason.

Hey! Writers are people, too, you know!

In conclusion, I’ll keep doing what I do when I can find the time to even do it. The first proof, again, is on its way. I’m already working on other projects. And I’ll start throwing on the thick promotion stuff soon.

In the meantime, thank you for your readership! And stay tuned for future updates by clicking on the Follow button. I hope to see YOU on the other side!

At The End Of The Line

Imagine something for a moment.

It’s after dark when they came banging at your door. You’re told to pack a bag filled with whatever you can grab; a bag that will later be taken from you and never seen again.Watch It Burn

Now imagine that you and your family being dragged out of your house and herded into the street. There are men with guns, barking dogs, and people crying and screaming all around you.

You’re loaded and carried away in trucks to the train that awaits you. No one has any idea what is going on, where they are being taken, or what is about to happen to them.

After a few minutes, the trucks come to a stop; you have arrived at the train station. More men with guns hastily let down the gate and yell at you to get out and move into formation. There are more dogs barking, crying, fear, confusion, and soon a door on the boxcar you crawled into is slammed shut and locked.

It’s a long ride to where you are going. But for a moment, and only for a moment, you relax for reasons you can’t explain. But, for you, things have just gotten started.

Finally, you arrive at your destination. The door opens and the scene upon getting out is more terrifying than anything you went through before getting on the train.

You’re torn apart from your family. You’re chances of seeing them again are slim to none. Your bag is tossed into a pile with bags of persons that came with you and before you.

What happens from here depends greatly on which destination you were sent to. Unfortunately, you have stepped foot in the worst possible place you could be.

You’re going to die here.

Thoughts of what is happening to your family are going through your head. At this point, you can only pray they are able to survive.

Book Delayed No Longer

After two months of my laptop being down for the count it’s working again. Unfortunately, the problem came at a bad time. I wasn’t able to work on Komplex Sinplicities, and thusly missed the Thanksgiving deadline.
 
So now I have to pick up where I left off, obviously. I have yet to set a new deadline, but another holiday is just around the corner so we may be looking at around Christmas.
 
Why wait until Christmas? Well, why not? Besides, it gives me time to do what I need to do and something for shoot for. Works for me!
 
Anyway, I apologize for the delay folks, but rest assured I’m doing my best! Keep an eye out for future updates, and thank you for your patience!

Laser Guided Treasure Hunting

As a treasure hunter, I find “treasure” in a lot of things. Metal detecting is my most favorite past time, but I also love digging bottles, collecting the occasional book, scraping metal, and so on. metal detecting for treasure

But several years ago, I was riding down the highway one day and I was looking at all the old houses and fields and day dreaming about what could be in the ground.

Then my imagination got a little too carried away and it came up with this nifty vision. As I was looking across the fields, my mind’s eye was laser pin pointing targets in the ground!

Of course, I don’t have any clue if there was really any treasure being marked, but as a writer, my imagination can turn thoughts into reality before my eyes.

Here’s how it works:

Picture in your head, for example, a field or something that you drive by all the time; someplace you would like to metal detect. Now imagine these continuous little beams of light shining down from the sky to spots on the ground.

Now imagine, if you will, that the beams are different colors according to whatever type of object is in the dirt – yellow for gold, blue for bottles, white for silver, red for iron… you get the picture.

So you have all these beams of light shining all over the place pin pointing coins and bottles and relics. And all you have to do is simply walk over and start digging! Wouldn’t that be sweet? Finding Lost Treasure

I think it would be amazing, myself, but then it would take out the fun of HUNTING for the stuff to begin with, wouldn’t it?

Treasure hunters of every sort have bad days. It’s true! But even a bad day looking for treasure is still a good day for us. And it’s crazy thoughts like this one that start working our wheels and make us try new techniques.

Maybe someday technology will give us treasure enthusiasts an upper hand at finding those impossible targets. And maybe, just maybe, we can even have a satellite in space beaming lights all over that only we treasure hunters can see.

But then that wouldn’t be “treasure hunting,” would it?

The Last People On Earth

Here’s an interesting thought I am sure many people have considered: WHAT IF you were the last person or persons on the face of the planet? Last Person On Earth

What would you do? Where would you go? How would you survive? Three basic questions, but very important questions should you happen to ever find yourself in this situation.

Whether the end of mankind is due to biblical events, or man made (virus/nuclear) causes, the scenario is a scary one if you think about it.

There’s many “preppers” out there that already have bunkers, food and water caches, and an arsenal of weapons and ammo. These guys, surprisingly, each have their own ideas and theories on how to make it through the apocalypse.

But what would I do? What would be my game plan? Well, I’ll tell ya:

Let’s say that some freak incident occurred and me and my wife were the last two human beings on earth. The first thing I would NOT have to worry about is shelter. Shelter, fire, and food/water are always at the top of any survivalist’s to-do list. But the priorities of each can vary depending on the situation.

So with millions upon millions of buildings across the landscape, shelter would rank low on the priority list. And thank goodness!

The next thing I would want to worry about is the means to create fire. And though I’ve had training with making fire without matches or lighters, mind you, it’s more difficult to do, I’d still take advantage of the man made resources available until they became unusable.

Having the ability to make fire means cooking food, sterilizing water, keeping warm, protection, and so on. Fire is essential for life if you plan on living for more than a couple of years; if you make it THAT long.

Food and water. let’s first handle the food problem. If we were the last people on earth then there will be an over abundance of canned food available.

We could live on this for a long time, but eventually it WILL go bad. Unless wheat grew on its on for years to come, and we found a way to bake bread without a conventional oven (which is easier than you think), then making things with grain would also be low on the priority list.

Wild edibles would be brought into diets more as staples than exotics. The need to hunt and fish would, of course, become the norm. Luckily, I can do both.

Water, on the other hand, would be at the top of the list on any given day. You can survive for days and days without food, but you have a week (give or take) to live. Less than that if you are in a hot and dry area.

But water should be everywhere, right? Yep! So what’s the problem? Lots! Not to get into all the ways to get clean water, the most common method is boiling it. Hence the need for fire.

Bleach will be easily accessible for awhile, and I know adding a few drops to a gallon of water (and letting it sit for a few hours) will bring the water to drinkable status.

Over time, clothing will be an issue, and I can see the return to wearing furs becoming the fashion. But, with abandoned clothing stores everywhere, we could probably avoid the fur issue for awhile.

Medicine. Sigh. There’s the monster! Sickness is inevitable. We would raid what storage cabinets we could, but not all medicine would be usable over time.

Back up generators could be used to provide electricity and refrigeration. But, in the long run, gas will become watered down and no good to use. I’m thinking distant future. End Of The World

We would keep what we could for as long as we could. After that, then it is what it is. In the meantime, herbal remedies, which I sometimes use already, will become our medicine closet.

One of the most important strategies to staying alive is one most people don’t think about: keeping busy! Whether alone or with my wife, I would make it a point to have fun, stay creative, and keep busy looking for supplies, water, and growing/finding food.

We’d need to relocate from time to time to keep up with food and supplies. I’d want to mark circles of distance on a map around our current location. This way I can set a limit to our gathering zone and where we are currently within said zone.

My vote wold be to take only what you think you need and those items you may not come across in the next area. Nomads and wild animals have learned this tactic long ago. It’s a good lesson to pick up.

Speaking of wild animals, what of the wild dogs and zoo animals? Wolves and coyotes? It’s my belief the first two would be the biggest concerns.

Domestic dogs are everywhere. And, eventually, they’re going to find their ancestral roots to survive. This means, possibly, turning on you. What zoo animals you have to worry about will begin congregating and re-populating. Luckily, guns and ammunition will easily attainable.

The thing you have to worry most about is being ambushed. And they will be a constant threat, so you better get use to the idea of no longer being at the top of the food chain. So, yeah, we would be packing at all times.

No one can tell you exactly how to survive through or after an apocalypse. But there are basic rules and strategies that most everyone will agree upon.

The smartest thing you can do is to not panic and use your head. Common sense, though seemingly a rare thing in today’s society, can go a long way.

So that’s a very broad and general view of what me and mine would do, but it’s a start. What would you do if you or your family were the last humans on earth? Share your survival plans with us in the comments!

My Wish List

Greetings, everybody!

And, welcome! To MY WISH LIST!

When I was thinking about writing this post I was thinking of some of the things that I actually have on my wish list. But then I got to thinking… Why not kick it up a notch? Why not make an EXTREME wish list? Wish List

So that’s what I decided to do. Also, trying to choose only one category to list this post under was a difficult choice to make. But I decided to list it under “Ramblings” because, well, just because.

OK! So let’s get on with it!

Some of the cool things I would really like to see, do, or own are:

  1. Experience ZERO gravity! (I think this one is on my real wish list, too.)
  2. Ride a rhinovirus! Wait… That’s suppose to be rhinoceros.
  3.  Walk the Red Carpet at a celebrity awards show…AND RECEIVE AN AWARD!
  4. Be able to morph into any animal at will.
  5. Be able to fly and/or turn invisible at will.
  6. Time travel! And see…the dinosaurs…
  7. Have enough money to buy no less than 5,000 acres of ANYTHING at the drop of a hat.
  8. Stand on the top of Mt. Everest and yodel at the top of my lungs like Tarzan.
  9. There is NO number 9!
  10. Be able to explore other planets.
  11. Take an exploration submarine trip to the bottom of the Marianas Trench.
  12. Take off in a fighter jet from an aircraft carrier. O-O-OH YEAH!
  13. Sail around Cape Horn in an old school style sailing ship.
  14. Fly around the world in a hot air balloon that looks like the head of Darth Vader.
  15. Own and be licensed to fly a real life mock up of the Millennium Falcon.
  16. Have a major motion picture based on one of my stories.
  17. Be able to actual enter into any book I want and be IN the story!
  18. Own a gigantic real life fire breathing dragon!
  19. Have my theme music. MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!
  20. Be able to fully communicate with any species of insect and animal.
  21. Invent something positive that would revolutionize mankind existence as we know it.
  22. Use the power of my mind to make litter gravitate before me into a tightly compacted ball for disposal.
  23. Cure worldwide violence.
  24. Experience WARP SPEED! ZO-O-OM!!!!!
  25. Hang out with real life Ewoks.
  26. Win the National Pancake Eating Championship!
  27. 1957 Ferrari 250 Testa Rossa. ‘Nuff said. But an old Shelby Cobra will do just fine, too! Anybody willing to donate a kit car?
  28. Take a tour of Cinderella’s castle.
  29. Ride a real life (and human friendly) Godzilla through the streets of Tokyo! Woo Hoo!
  30. Own a real life, fully functional LIGHT SABER! If you can get me one then we’ll talk about details later.

Ok! So there’s my 30 (well, 29) things I’d like to see, do, or own. Hope you enjoyed the list, and leave a comment some of the things YOU have on your EXTREME wish list!